Broken?

My son just broke his sixteenth bone in fifteen years... actually to be more accurate it would be in seven years, since he broke his first bone when he was about eight years old. That's pretty impressive - in a way, although ultimately I'm not sure how I feel about it. We spend more time at doctor's offices and clinics and emergency rooms than most people do at the grocery store. It seems funny when you say it like that, but in reality it's no fun for anyone - least of all him :(

Still, life keeps going and the world keeps spinning and my cache of durable medical equipment, including slings, splints, walking boots and crutches, continues to grow. Soon I'm going to open my own medical thrift shop. Maybe I'll even write a song about it and put together a really bizarre You Tube video that will get millions of hits :)

My son goes 150% or not at all, and I happen to love that about him. In fact, every time I start to get frustrated, I remember that he's just like me, and I can't very well fault him for that, can I? :)

I played soccer for about ten years - all or nothing. Broken bones, torn ligaments, concussions...If I was going to go for the ball I went for it with everything I had. The fact of the matter is, you don't learn the limits of your body or your skills unless you push past them.

I feel that way about a lot of things, actually. Especially writing. Anyone can string a few sentences together and dribble them awkwardly down the field toward the goal line. But to have any kind of finesse that's enjoyable to watch / read, you need to practice. A lot :)

Some writers get frustrated with this part of the process. I guess they think they should be the rare child prodigy who can pick up a pen and paper and just "play"... but for me it's all part of the curve. When I read what I wrote five years ago I think "Wow. That's not even my voice anymore."

That's ok. It's a good thing. It means that I'm expanding my skill set and refining my touch. And if I fail, it doesn't mean I'm "broken" - it just means I went for it and learned a little bit more in the process of going for it than those who are unwilling to try at all.

I feel like half my life on this blog is spent trying to explain / apologize for why I haven't written more, published more, or finished more of the projects I have vision for, but life is what happens when we're making other plans, and life seems to happen to me with a certain "fullness" that I can't control. Sometimes you just have to roll with it.

I am currently working on a screenplay for Letters From The Ledge. It's a fantastic project and I'm very excited about it. But I'm also trying to finish and edit Truly and Finn's stories, get cover art finalized and start the process of proofreading and formatting those books for print, as well as trying to redesign the websites. I'll get there, eventually. It just takes time.

But all of that is my "other life" - my day to day reality includes a husband, four kids, two dogs, a disabled mom, a part-time job and things like broken bones, surgeries and doctor's offices. Years ago I had a palm pilot with a collapsible keyboard and I would whip that out at all our many doctor's visits to try and keep my life on track...Now it's an iPhone but the process is the same.

Life is busy. It takes practice, and I've had a lot of it :) I'm not sure if that makes me good at it or just plain crazy, but either way I'm doing the best that I can, one day at a time.

Life is also about trying, falling down, and getting back up again. I have no doubt whatsoever that my son will be back on a snowboard just as soon as he is physically able, hitting that rail and trying that same trick over and over again until he lands it just right.

It isn't in him to quit, and I think I love that about him most of all...